Decode the subject-object mystery that confounds even grammar enthusiasts. Learn the simple substitution trick that makes this distinction automatic.

The Essential Rule

• Who = Subject (performs action)
• Whom = Object (receives action)

If you can substitute "he/she," use who. If you can substitute "him/her," use whom.

Who: The Subject Pronoun

Who performs the action in a sentence or clause.

Direct Questions

• Who called you? (He called you)
• Who is coming? (She is coming)
• Who made this? (He made this)
• Who knows? (She knows)

In Clauses

• The person who helped me (he helped)
• Anyone who wants to join (she wants)
• Students who study hard (they study)
• The artist who painted this (she painted)

Memory Trick

WHO = When He Or she acts

Whom: The Object Pronoun

Whom receives the action or follows a preposition.

Direct Questions

• Whom did you call? (You called him)
• Whom should I contact? (I should contact her)
• Whom are you meeting? (You are meeting him)
• Whom did they choose? (They chose her)

After Prepositions

• To whom it may concern
• For whom the bell tolls
• With whom are you going?
• About whom were you talking?

In Clauses

• The person whom I met (I met him)
• The client whom we served (we served her)
• Someone whom you know (you know him)

Memory Trick

WHOM = When Him Or her Matters

The Substitution Test

Transform the sentence to test:

1. "(Who/Whom) wrote this?"

   • Test: "He wrote this" ✓
   • Answer: Who

2. "(Who/Whom) did you see?"

   • Test: "You saw him" ✓
   • Answer: Whom

3. "The manager (who/whom) hired me"

   • Test: "She hired me" ✓
   • Answer: Who

4. "The manager (who/whom) I respect"

   • Test: "I respect her" ✓
   • Answer: Whom

Modern Usage Notes

Conversational English

"Who" is increasingly acceptable in casual speech, even when "whom" is technically correct.

• Casual: "Who did you give it to?"
• Formal: "To whom did you give it?"

When to Use Whom

• Formal writing
• Academic papers
• Legal documents
• After prepositions (always)

Common Patterns

Always WHO:

• Who knows?
• Who cares?
• Who's there?
• Guess who?

Always WHOM:

• To whom...
• For whom...
• With whom...
• Of whom...

Practice Exercise

Choose the correct word:

1. (Who/Whom) sent this email?
2. (Who/Whom) should we invite?
3. The teacher (who/whom) everyone loves is retiring.
4. (Who/Whom) are you voting for?
5. She's someone (who/whom) I admire.
6. (Who/Whom) told you that?
7. The person to (who/whom) you spoke was wrong.
8. (Who/Whom) do you think will win?
9. The author (who/whom) wrote this book is famous.
10. For (who/whom) is this gift intended?

Answer Key: 1. Who, 2. Whom, 3. who, 4. Whom, 5. whom, 6. Who, 7. whom, 8. Who, 9. who, 10. whom

Remember: Who acts (like he/she), Whom receives (like him/her). When in doubt in casual writing, "who" is usually acceptable!